A little rut in my life..

Recently I am a little down, the work is sucking up my life. I like my boss and the job, but just feeling burned out especially when clients call you after office hours and I find myself working on a Sunday. 

My sis says its a normal phenomenon because economy is bad and everywhere is like this, but I start wondering really?!

There’s got to be work life balance somewhere right? I am grateful for the job. H & I has save enough for the reno fund (one yr ahead of schedule, with help from the in-laws) and I can even think about adding a concept wall when we were limited to basics 2 yrs back. We are even planning to buy another second-hand car at the end of the year when the current one comes to end of COE. All this will not have been possible if I am still with the fashion company. I even recently bought a channel wallet on chain, my personal reward which is more than my fashion job one month salary.

But once in a while, I find myself wistful, hands itching to create a garment, but yet lazy to do anything. I am actually toying with the idea to go for another short term  course with Taftc just to give myself the discipline to sew. I seem to only do well in a guided environment which is bad… Same for work, it’s hard for me to work from home. I have to be at office or somewhere else which is why I am here at a cafe on Sun afternoon, but yet am blogging and journaling instead of clearing my backlog…

Yet yesterday I was thinking why didn’t I go on an extended break to Europe after I graduated? Instead I jumped straight into a job. It was like this even during my career switch.. It’s like I have a need to constantly keep myself busy instead of rotting my days away..

Anyway I am digressing, the reason why I am in a little rut is that recently I am thinking about my passion for fashion again. I start to wonder if I really have to follow my dreams or just be what I am good at,like my current job? After all Steve jobs speech to Stanford graduates which inspired me to quit and came back from Taiwan (amongst other pressing reasons) didn’t really apply to him in real life. It’s like his passion is new age guru stuff, but you don’t see him becoming a yogi. So although I like fashion, it doesn’t mean I have to be a designer right? And recently I am questioning myself, so do I really like fashion and want to start my own label or it’s the artwork aspect I like?

Because I don’t want to come up with a commercial line. While thinking abt this yesterday, I re-read my outline of my business plan which I wrote during my Taftc course, I am 8 years away from hitting that goal and honestly I don’t know if I can do it. It’s like when you get married and if you have kids, all kinds of financial commitment come into play.

I was reading Fuschia Lane’s founder and how she started the label with $2K. I don’t think I have that type of courage and yet some part of me wish I have, contradictory right?

Or maybe those who read this and whoever considered or attempts a career switch will experience it. It doesn’t mean I am giving up totally, I still harbor hopes I will do something, but now with the work sucking up so much of the time I don’t know how.

I am actually going to attend a 2 day workshop end of this month to learn about building a passive Income stream. Hopefully the investment will be worth it and not too complicated and I can have some income to quit my current job.

Not that I don’t like the job. I like what I do and am really thankful for my current boss. But right now the job is a vehicle for me to boost my savings. Ultimately 5-10 yrs down the road, I hope to amass enough to do what I like to do I.e my own dreams

 

my painting I did yesterday


Leaving you with something I saw during my recent BKK trip  

 let’s make that footstep today guys! 

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